What can I say? I'm a people pleaser. I turned towards him with squinted eyes wondering if I was hearing things. He was a lot bigger than me but I didn't feel threatened. I guess being raised by my grandparents gave me more patience towards older folks. His legs remained still as he leaned towards the top of the stairs.
"Excuse me. Do you know which G train is headed towards Long Island City?"
"Umm. It should say right there."
I stuck my head down trying to find the sign without having to climb all the way down the stairs to no avail. I ran down the steps. Skipped the last step for fun. Saw that both signs at the top of the platform read Brooklyn bound. Or something like that.
"That one's going to Brooklyn. Try the other side." The man gingerly took a few steps down but I decided to head back down to check both sides again to only further confusion.
"Yeah both sides are going to Brooklyn." I couldn't make what he said but I paced forward then back trying to appear as if I am inching closer to finding a solution for the stranger. The further I got, the more comfortable I was with leaving him alone. And that's just what I did.
"Sorry I can't help you out here." I don't think he heard me. I spoke just as softly as he did and was not turning back around. After all, he was bound to find somebody with more transit knowledge than myself. He's a big boy, he can manage. I wasn't even sure if he knew he was already in Long Island City. I was gonna tell him that but didn't want to sound condescending. The walk towards the 7 train left me wondering why anybody would ask me for help. I am usually told that I don't come off as very friendly. I return to my race against time as I reach the platform and make my way towards the dead end where the first train cart will arrive. Fortunately for me, it got there just when I had reached the front. The trains were packed per usual on a 6 pm weekday. I saw enough room in the first cart and proceeded to enter gently as I leaned
against the door. An old woman to my right and a gentleman to my left who couldn't seem to remain still. I barely had enough room to breathe let alone move. My eyes were glued to the backpack hanging off a stranger's back. We were all bunched up with the same goal, get to our destination. Unfortunately the man to my left had other plans. I could see him through my peripheral vision. He pulled his arm towards his chest and began softly rubbing his shoulder. His elbow was inches away from my face. He'd eventually put his arm down but then began looking at his stretched out hand as if it were glowing. He leaned heavily on the train door and kept looking out the window as if there was something calling out to him.
I took a glimpse at him and could tell he'd spend one too many nights at the gym. The slight hint of body odor disappeared once I saw Ed Hardy esque clothes. To each his own, I thought. The cocky look on his face made me wonder if this guy was looking for a fight. I ignored him and did my best to ignore the rest of the men and women around me. They were already a little close to me as I would've liked. Then we hit 61st and Woodside which made me think, "Should I squeeze in the few inches that separated my face from another passenger's? Or should I leave the cart to let the others inside?" I moved forward with my head hanging as low as possible. I wonder what the man to my left would do. I noticed he didn't bother moving an inch, deciding against common courtesy.
"Hey! Don't fucking touch me!" he groaned at one particular guy attempting to get through the train door.
"Move in!" the younger man fired back. He was more kid than man. Taller in height but the sound of his voice was that of a school kid. His bookbag was also a dead giveaway. I didn't look at him directly, choosing to ignore the chaos instead. The two men continued to bicker back and forth and stare each other down as the school kid moved towards the center of the train shaped zoo.
"Go to school" said the older gentleman with a thick Spanish accent. He then made his best attempt at throwing different curse words together to no avail.
"Yeah, I am going to school because I'm getting an education so I don't sound like you." Check mate. That line drew some smiles from the other passengers but not me.
"Fuck you, you bastard," the older man said while clenching his fist. He was inches away from me and I felt that if something was going to go down, his gorilla like arms will most likely be swung inadvertently towards me. The old lion began to tense up as his eyes didn't budge against the young lion. The kid was not going to back down. He refused to look away. I wondered what I would do if a brawl ensued. Would it be considered a fight in a phone booth? Would I put my hands on the man with the larger frame? Was I gonna learn something new about myself today? Will all my time spent watching UFC fights pay off? Should I go for a rear naked choke? Shoot for a double leg? Flying knee? Spinning heel kick?
At that moment I briefly forgot about the showdown and thought back to one of the most vicious knockouts in MMA history. I quickly snapped back to reality and stared back towards my left upon realizing that I had nowhere to lean or hold onto as the train doors shut. Somebody took my place and leaned against the door as I had entered no-man's land. Too far to reach for a pole, I had no other reliance but my feet hoping they remained glued to the hollow floor. My body swiftly move forward and back as the train began to pick up speed. I firmly pressed down hard hoping that I don't wind up flailing into somebody's arms. As romantic as it sounded, there was way too much testosterone in the air. Instead I would take a deep breath and act like I was physically under control.
One more stop and I'll be out of this hell hole. Each bump would make me regret moving towards the center. That's what I get for being polite, I guess. This felt like an awkward family reunion where everyone could be found in the same place but also completely avoiding eye contact or any other kind of contact with one another. 69th, 74th, 82nd street, 90th, almost there. I felt like a bobble head doll with how much rocking back and forth I was doing. Then finally, I arrived. I softly left the train doing my best not to ruffle any feathers. Who knows what happened to the two guys. I'd like to think they kissed and made up by the end of the ride.
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